1. |
Isn't life
02:23
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Where is your smile ?
I must admit that I lost mine
Why is it so dark ?
Far away beyond your eyes
Then you grab my hand
And light comes back
I feel that stab
All the way down my broken spine
They brought us the food
But I could not eat a single bite
I craved to touch your cheeks
And promise everything would be all right
The day was gone
When we left
Surrounding us, the night
Your smell, your touch
Was all I ever asked, before I died
Crawl away back home
Pictures of you still alive
In my drunken mind
Isn't life... isn't life... ?
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2. |
1997
03:06
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Our laughs are flying in the air
We float a million miles away
So far so good, we used to say
This year we could have lived for
Nineteen ninety seven years more
I kiss you when he doesn't look
(The taste of golden love)
We float a million miles away
(From their little talk)
We didn't know it wouldn't last
(Fall was almost here)
This year we should have lived for
Nineteen ninety seven years more
We should have known those things are meant
(we were too young to see)
To disappear à tout jamais
(Why should we give a damn ?)
Beauty was us, yes, nothing less
(And nothing nothing more)
This love we have fallen for
Nineteen ninety seven, nevermore
These days will never stop
They're living bright in our hearts
We were the stars the moon the center
Of the world
And if you think memories die
They're carved up in stone
We were the 1997 lords
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3. |
Cold hands
03:32
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You whispered
The words you wrote for me
I kept the letter
But the lines began to blur
Daddy never came in the frozen house
He knew I was in trouble
Ten days all alone
With your ghost
The doctor came
With a needle in his hand
Relief at last
Just a shot away from death
Daddy never came in the frozen house
He knew I was in trouble
Storm reclaimed the land
I didn't belong to
You said 'Write some songs, with your guts, my son'
By dawn you were gone leaving just a hole in our hearts
You said 'To dust, we shall all return"
I would spit in the face of the god that is deaf
The winter night
You died was cold as the hands
We tried to give
Alone, we were in this awe
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4. |
Dying fire
04:08
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Well we can stare at this dying fire
Fascinated by the flickering light
Both of us know there is something better
Than sleeping in a barren bed
Went through the mexican shady hours
Fascinated by the infinite lights
We drank away our youth, sharing laughter
We lived together a thousand lives
We cried, we yelled, we rampaged the world
Feral, untamed, we bit the feeding hands
Nothing could stop us then
If love is a gun, we run out of rounds
We stare at this dying fire
New York city was a bitching liar
We knew better than that to sell our hearts
We crossed the jungles, the lonely borders
Fascinated by the tiniest light
You held my hand through the darkest hours
And brought to life two beating hearts
We cried, we yelled, we rampaged the world
Feral, untamed, we bit the feeding hands
Nothing could stop us then
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5. |
The wig looked wrong
05:27
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The ambulance stopped at the gate
You came down with this thing on your head
You thought it would ease our pain
But shivers of fright run down my skin
The wig looked wrong, its colors not fitting
Your withered face
We lied as we said it was cool, it wasn't
We hugged and cried at the threshold
The house was cold, this day you came back
Dying with us
The wig looked wrong, its colors too bright
For your terrified blue eyes
You smiled and tried to cheer us up
There was no place to hide
Hearing you moan at night
Covered my head under my pillow
Your agony was
The worse way to go
In a dream I saw you at night
In the garden haze
Kazan was barking like hell broke loose
He knows You wont be back
The wig looked wrong, in the gloomy mirage
You were a heap of bones
You disappeared in the mist, I cried
Running after you
The rabid dog would bite my face
Resentful and mad
We all looked wrong, in the picture we took
With our broken smiles
Morphine held you in her arms
Making you see some stars
Monsters crawled out under the shadows
You agony was
The way you had to go
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6. |
You didn't seem to care
03:58
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Dad, please forgive those words I sing
They're out of love, you know
We lived our lives at a distance
For so long
When mother died you were already down
Living on your own
I needed a father but I had a dad
That I didn't know
You didn't seem to care much about my things
I would speak so low
But there's that silly question that still remains
Even though you're gone
Did you care ?
You would take me to the shopping mall
And we'd share a meal
Was it all that I would ever get
To rebuild my drenched, dried heart ?
Daddy did I understand, when I called last night ?
Your words were drunk
Remember I came to your house and I brought my daughter
We took a shot
Today I stare at the picture and I want to cry
Where were you ?
You didn't seem to care
That's what I feel, that's what I grieve
You would take me to the shopping mall
And we'd share a meal
Was it all that I would ever get
To rebuild my drenched, dried heart ?
To rebuild my heart
Dad, please forgive those words I sing
they're out of love, you know
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7. |
Gin tonic & lime
02:01
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Your favorite drink was gin tonic and lime
And thousand tears of grief
Your face was black with make up running
All the way down your cheeks
The kitchen table was holding its breath
It tried to keep you from drowning
We were together in this
Hell of a time
Sister I saw you down in that well
We couldn't be much deeper
Yet joy was all around pain away for a while
You made me feel safe and sound
We shared our meals you drunk, me high
It was a breath of life
We were together in this
Hell of a time
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8. |
Stupid birds
03:00
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9. |
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Six in the morning brother you came, you've never been late for me
Go up the stairs there's something out there that's gonna make us feel the need
For better days, better smiles, better friends, better happiness and love and life
Never missed the train but always running late
Bursts of laugh in your car, we couldn't care less
Rainy days can't ruin our fun, for nothing in the world
We've been through the storm
Walking our own way
And now it feels good
To meet you again
In this light
Death was all around and you took a step back but you never remained far away
We never were the kind to display any kind of things that were inside our hearts
It never ever meant that we didn't give a damn, beyond any doubt
Stoned in your car, we never felt so close, riding in the dark
Rise the morning light
Death like days are far behind
The sky is clear and bright
You look like Dad
Well at least in my eyes
You'd bring me to the station
And wave goodbye
That was all I needed at that time
Brother we are very different
But blood inside our veins is much the same
I've met you again in this light
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10. |
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Looking at the coffin going down
Under
I feel ashamed for thinking of
My own death, not yours
The day was hot, we had sunglasses
Hiding our tears
I had a few moments alone
With your dead body
I wish someone would tell me this
What was I supposed to feel ?
I felt just like a little boy
Sister was begging for the words
She waited for them all her life
What were we all supposed to feel ?
We threw a handful of earth
On the wooden box
Then you disappeared forever
Deep down underground
We drank together at your house
Sister yelled all along
Her love was unfathomable
Just as her anger
I looked at it from a distance
Is it real or a dream ?
My brain stopped, my heart dropped
We were the heads now of the family
The next to end up in a box
It could be you, it could be me
Went to your room, your smell was here
Sat on your chair, like you
Daddy, you're gone, and left the world
A worse place to live, without you
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11. |
Triumph of life
03:56
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I didn't want a kid
That's how stupid I was
Your mom has always been
Much smarter than I was
On this snowy day
You came out of the void
I loved you outright
I didn't want your sis'
That's the kind of fool I was
She's such a little storm
Yet such a little bird
If life made any sense
I'm not sure what it was
Then we hug in pyjamas
And the beauty of the world says :
No more rainy
Death like days
With my baby
In my arms
Light's suddenly brighter
The dawn is here
Break through the clouds, the glorious
Triumph of life
You wake me up at night
And fight over a toy
You wake me up at dawn
And broke my crumbling back
Yet not a single time
Did I want to go back
Well, maybe once or twice...
My love for you my girls
Is to the end of times
I'd annihilate the world
To shield you from its rage
It keeps amazing me
How soft your skin can be
Gracious, you are not
No, you are grace embodied
No more worries
Late at night
I love you babies
In my guts
Light's suddenly brighter
The dawn is here
Break through the clouds, the glorious
Triumph of life
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I'dawn Bordeaux, France
Renaud Ehrengardt is the main composer of I'dawn. He has lived on four continents, playing music with many different people along the way. I'dawn was his first solo project and the more personal. Now living in Morocco, Renaud eats tajine in Marrakech.
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